Emotional Rant.
You sit and wonder, torturing yourself. Stalk google, twitter, and facebook. You want to know what they’re doing, how they are. Too cowardly to ask them directly for fear of silence, you look for little snippets of their reality. You wonder how they can “miss you” yet never reach out. You ponder if it’s bullshit or sincere. Either way you just can’t let them go.
You get angry at yourself for the constant state of self torture. The tug of the heart strings, the hopeful wonder. You mentally slap yourself over and over again. You’re no longer, separated by hundreds of miles, yet you still can’t forget them.
Forget how they made you feel. How it felt to walk beside them. Their dimples, scruff, intense dark eyes. The ease of falling in step. The laughter. The intimate moments you play over and over. Their hands through your hair. Their breath on your skin.
It will get better. They will go away. You will be happy and open to falling in love again. But right now it’s about time. Time to forget the conversations. Get some distance from their flesh. Forget the sound of their voice and how much you enjoyed listening to them talk about anything.
It will get better and you won’t feel like such an intense idiot for feeling this way.
