Aye Spy

While I was in Florence my sister asked me again: “But why are you dating this guy? You see no future with him and I’m constantly seeing you dating for dating sake. Why don’t you just wait until you meet someone you actually want to be with and date them?”

Those words repeated over and over again on my last (and ultimate failure of a trip) with the Frenchman.

I knew he wasn’t the one but it was fun and exciting to date someone new, foreign, and who could speak another language.

But things got old right quick when the bigger picture came into play. He is a complete, and utter, chauvinist. The woman’s place is at home and he constantly tried to convince me that if a rich man came along, I would just want to take care of our babies, and lunch with my friends, and ya know, have no ambition of my own. (Which is, beyond, insulting.)

And the “play fights” over whether or not I would succumb to his desire to have me clean his…well…everything (shirts, pants, dishes, apartment…) got even older.

So after 2 very long days in the gorgeous city of Strasbourg, I knew it was time to let the Frenchman go and truly close up shop until I actually meet someone I like. Adore. Couldn’t see myself without.

It’s been a very long time since, but I have absolute faith. 

There are a few recent men in my life that I have briefly dated who are annoying the “f” out of me (still)

We either broke up (or rather they broke up with me) or they quite literally disappeared….never to be heard from again….except through facebook.

All of these guys I was friends with, and therefore facebook friends with, before we started dating. Hence how they got access to my profile (I do not friend guys I just meet, nor do I friend guys I am just dating. It’s too soul baring)

Yet these dudes who have disappeared from my life (from their own choosing I might add) CONSISTENTLY like my facebook statuses.

What.the.hell.

I have hidden them from my timelines (as I feel like de-friending them would seem too “aggressive”) but them liking my statuses I feel is ridiculously passive aggressive.

One dude literally disappeared - have not heard from him in 2 months - and he disappeared right after I asked the question “so, um, are we dating? Cause I keep getting asked out on dates from other guys but I don’t know what’s going on between us.” I even went so far as to say “not that I’m looking for a commitment, but I’d just like to know.” And that was met with complete and utter silence. 

Except when he likes my facebook statuses!

What the hell is the etiquette when it comes to this? Someone needs to write a book.

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!

I am dating a lovely Frenchman and he is easily the most “manly” man I have ever, ever dated. Even the way he walks oozes supreme confidence on where is he going and what he is looking for.

This is a departure for me. I’m quite stubborn, and independent and having a man literally take care of things is a little off putting.

What’s most interesting is our very different views about roles for men and women in a household. He is very traditional where he would like his wife to eventually stay home (if finances permit) and I am not. That sounds like a death sentence for me.

This isn’t the first guy I’ve dated who has a very traditional view on the roles for men and women. But I really wonder why they date me when they apparently desire someone to cook and clean for them. I am extremely ambitious and have stated multiple times how I want to open my own business, make my mark, leave a legacy behind. I want to create something that will ensure my children (and I) are secure in the future.

At what point does that scream “I want to be a housewife!”

I like to think that maybe I’m the challenge they’ve been looking for. That after a lot of girls who said “As you want” that me saying “Um, what?” is refreshing.

Let’s see if my prophecy comes true. I know it will be when he cleans his plate (and I don’t mean with a fork)

My friend keeps telling me over and over again that if he’s not willing to make me a priority then I can’t make him mine.

I keep practicing what he preaches but it’s tiring sometimes to watch how easily they fall.